Dignity and Trust

So, in the show that I'm doing that opens April 23rd, we have a lot of wigs. I, as a member of the ensemble, have 4 wigs alone (one is my Fiordiligi wig that I brought in as I know it fits me). Now, I posted earlier about how the folks were about letting me come in at 6pm, a half hour before everyone else, so I could try them on without the rest of the cast looking on. It would have worked, if the wig lady was actually there. Instead, I was third to get fitted (even though I was first to get there) although she did let me go into one of the private dressing rooms for it.

So, keeping the above in mind, we got an email about wigs (and we will be getting a lecture tonight)which said that we all needed to have a Wig Buddy -- someone who will help us with our wigs, pin them on, make sure they are straight, etc. We will also have multiple wig caps which we will need to change out depending on the wig.

It feels like all the sensitivity that was shown before was sort of stomped on and ground into the cement floor, you know?

I understand that they're assuming the worst and I understand their reasoning for this. However, I have also been wearing wigs almost non-stop since the middle of February and can feel when they're not on straight. Also, there is nothing to pin any wig on to...in fact, pinning it onto a wig cap might cause the cap to fall off!

It becomes an issue, for me, of dignity and trust. They don't know me...they don't know how I care for wigs and costumes. I get that. However, they do know that I'm very sensitive about being seen with my naked, bald head by everyone. I realize that we do have a couple fast changes and I know that it is probably going to be inevitable, but I was really hoping to deal with this on my own terms and not to have to be forced to have someone who would be staring at my head.

I don't know if I should say anything or just get a wig buddy who might be sensitive to this and ask them to please let me do my own thing and they can tell me if it's crooked. The more I think about it, the more upset I think I'm getting. They told us to bring one of our wigs for the lecture and I'm afraid that it's going to be some sort of hands-on demonstration with the entire cast present. Really, it's not something that I need. I'm also very hesitant when they say that they will just pin the wigs to the wig caps. Wig caps are notorious for being too big for my head and pinning weight on them really doesn't seem like the best way to keep them on.

What I'm really kind of upset over is that it feels like my dignity is really being forced from me. It's one thing for me to do this on my own terms and to decide how, but it feels like I'm really being forced into exposing something that really makes me very uncomfortable right now. It's not that I look hideous, but it's very startling and there are 3 teenagers in the cast who will probably stare and either whisper among themselves or...I don't know what. I'd say about half the cast knows...others might suspect. But I still want it to be on my terms...not something that I'm forced to do by a wig lady at a Community Theater.

To those of you who are in the show and may read this (you know who you are), I honestly have nothing against the show or the theater group or the woman doing the wigs.